I am confused as to who I am or what I want to be and it is making me have bad anxiety

Hey there, I’m glad that you keep posting back and opening up more about how you feel. I’m going to tackle your points one by one.

I am unemployed, have been for a long time

How do you feel about looking for part time work? It would give you a break from study and give you some independance.

I can’t afford a psychologist every week/fortnight so the uni counseling team will have to do. I saw my psychiatrist a few weeks ago to see how my medication has been over the past year since I last saw him. Everything was going not bad, just this weekend it has hit me.

The school counselor is a good start. Make it a goal to get an appointment and get the ball rolling on that. This weekend hasn’t been good but we do hit bumps in the road. It’s good that you came here it’s a step in wanting to seek help.

I get down on myself for not being a great singer and songwriter, I look at the legends and it gets me feeling sad that I can’t get to that level after years of playing. It’s the only thing I enjoy. I played guitar this morning and it helped me feel better temporarily.

Look at the positive here, It’s a lot more than i can do and its a great outlet to have. I want you to google ‘Guitar meetups’ or ‘songwriters workshop meetup’. You can join groups with people of the same interests and jam or get together and enjoy what you all have in common. It’s a great way to meet new people and having a common interest makes that little bit easier, no struggling with small talk etc.

I just feel at nearly 33 I am a failure. How can I be a psychologist or teacher when I feel like this?
Everyone around me is in relationships or announcing they are in a relationship online yet I have never had a girlfriend. I am a failure in everything.

You’re 33. Who put the time limit on when you need to do things by? You are not a failure, your anxiety is making you feel this way. Maybe take a break from social media. It can be depressing to see what everyone else is doing and comparing ourselves to them. Everyone’s journey is different, you don’t need to keep up with anyone. Who knows, you could meet a girl at one of the music meetup sessions.

The medication has helped as I generally more stable but I get periods from time to time.
I am so indecisive with everything.

We all have ups and downs, it’s part of the journey. Anxiety makes you indecisive, you need to get onto that.

Let me know how you go with googling the meetup group. Just look into it and see what you think.