I’m Married But Constantly Thinking About Someone Else | ReGain

Ideally, we’re all about the other person and don’t have concern about anything. Fall in love with a person, date them, and commit to living a life with your lover. Does that sound like you? Probably not if you’re reading this. Are you someone who struggles with being a married woman feelings for another woman? If you’re a married person who constantly thinks about someone else, read this article. Chances are it’s because you’re married lonely.

Feeling Confused About Your Feelings For Someone Else?

Sort Them Out With A Licensed Marriage Therapist.

“It’s always important to decipher if you are in love with the other person or in love with the idea of a fresh start.” The excitement of new romance may mislead us into believing that it will always feel this way.” – Aaron Horn LMFT

We live in a world that is anything but perfect, and this includes the chance that you might fall out of love with your wife, husband, or partner or fall in love with someone other than your spouse, constant thinking of someone else.

You’ll inevitably other people attractive outside your marriage, constantly or just occasionally — that’s just human nature. But unfortunately, sometimes that fleeting attraction turns into something more.

So, you’ve taken your marriage vows, but realize you’re constantly thinking about someone else. Maybe that someone else is a coworker, a friend of a friend, or someone you meet from married affairs websites. Is having feelings for someone else while married normal? What should you do?

You’re Thinking About Them, But Are You Really In Love with Someone Else?

Attraction can be confusing and inscrutable, especially when you’re feeling caught between having interest in someone else in your existing relationship — it can be hard to recognize if you’re madly in love with someone else, or if you’re simply experiencing impermanent feelings of longing for that someone else.

Here are several signs that indicate that you might be loving someone you can’t have and thinking about someone other than your spouse.

• You find ways to spend time around them
• You miss them when they’re gone
• You open up to them about yourself
• You happened to compare them to your spouse or partner
• You’re becoming interested in their favorite things
• You constantly check your phone for new messages from them
• You can’t stop thinking about them
• You feel guilty hanging out with them
• You start to lie or keep secrets from your spouse
• Your mood changes for the better around them
• You decide to dress up when you know you’re going to see them
• The chemistry between you is almost tangible

It’s important to note that the items on this list are more than likely very similar to the things you experienced when you first entered your current relationship. Ask yourself — does your new love look like how your married relationship looked when you first fell madly in love with each other? Internal honesty is critical, and the first step to overcoming issues like these can be truthfully saying to yourself, “I’m in love with someone who isn’t my spouse. Now how do I fix my marriage or move forward?”, “Is my marriage over?” You must recognize that any relationship will have ups and downs, but your steadfast dedication to each other will steer both of you through the challenges.” Intimacy and emotional connection are the foundations of a strong sexual relationship or romance in marriage, which can strengthen physical relationships and even marriages.

You’re Married But In Love With Someone Else. What Should You Do?

There’s a fine line between being in love with someone, or thinking about an emotional affair, and taking it to the next step and having a physical affair by being the other woman. Nevertheless, the steps to take are the same as an emotional affair.

Regardless of whether an affair is physical or merely emotional, stepping outside the bounds of your marriage can do immense damage to your relationship, married hookup is a step that you cannot undo no matter how much you regret after, so it’s crucial to proceed with constant caution.

If you’re married but in love with another man, it can be important to decipher why you may have constant thoughts of that person. First, let’s look at why couples have affairs.

Potential reasons for one partner having an affair:

Why Couples Cheat On Each Other?

• Lack of sexual satisfaction (desiring sexual encounters)
• Lack of emotional satisfaction (wanting emotional validation from someone else)
• Falling out of love (falling in love with someone else)
• Lack of spark and excitement in the marriage (wanting new and thrilling experiences)

Married, But Constantly Thinking About Someone Else

There are four options if you find yourself thinking of someoneelse and are debating about or have already had an affair:

1. End the affair with that other woman or man, and fix things with your marriage
2. Stay in your marriage while continuing a relationship with that someone
3. Accept that your marriage has run its course, and leave them for your lover
4. Wait until your lover ends your extramarital relationship

We’ll assume you’re interested in the first option, given the fact that the other three can cause additional and lasting damage to your marriage and may more than likely lead to a divorce.

But, you should examine your relationship with this person and your relationship with your spouse honestly, and ruminate on the effects of any of these decisions.

Ok, You’ve Had an Affair. Thinking About What To Do Now

Statistics

The percentage of couples who have had an affair varies. Researchers have estimated that marital infidelity occurs in roughly 2.3 percent of women, and 4.3 percent of men.

Other studies suggest that as many as 25 percent of men and 11 percent of women will, at a point in their lives, end up having an affair. Either way, you’re not the only person, and just because an affair has occurred doesn’t mean that there can’t be a new and even better relationship; in fact, it’s entirely possible.

If a relationship can survive an affair through hard work, communication, and healthy boundaries, it can become better than ever.

At this point, you’re probably asking, “how can I save my relationship?” Here are a few steps to take that will best position your relationship for success:

Saving Your Relationship From A Divorce Or Separation

Stop All Constant Communication with the Other Person

The immediate first step in the question of “how can I save my relationship?” must be removing the other person from your life. As long as they are still in the picture, no matter how minuscule it may appear, then you can’t move forward with healing your marriage.

The bottom line is that your marriage is in dire straits, and there’s no better time to stop all forms of communication, including social media communication, with the other person than now. The focus, energy, and attention on working to heal your marriage and you must be the priority.

Feeling Confused About Your Feelings For Someone Else?

Sort Them Out With A Licensed Marriage Therapist.

Remove That Someone Else & Be All About Spouse.

When you begin to think,“how can I rebuild my marriage?”,“how can I fix my marriage?”or think “how can I save 

When you begin to think,“how can I rebuild my marriage?”,“how can I fix my marriage?”or think “how can I save my married life?”, one of your first steps should be to put time and effort into the relationship you have at home.

Enact some much needed personal boundaries and redirect the time and energy that you gave to the other person to your spouse. Now that you’ve removed the other co-worker, acquaintance, or golf-buddy from your day-to-day activities, you now can move forward and constantly give your attention and effort to the same person you committed to—your spouse.

While we may have at one point had blind faith in our married life that would keep us in love with our spouses, the truth is that any successful relationship requires maintenance and proper care.

Rekindle the Lost Love Flame

One primary reason why someone can be married but thinking about someone else is that relationships loses its honeymoon luster and falls victim to the temptation is that we put all the emphasis on what a relationship is in categories such as happiness, joy, love, ecstasy, and lots of sex. Anyone not in a new relationship who has been together a long time will attest to the fact that those things eventually fade away. This is the starting stage for a potentially lost marriage if nothing is done to prevent it.

Faith In Your Love

Many of us continue thinking and have faith our relationship will always stay strong and passionate on its own, however, one of the keys to soul-satisfying love is actively remembering what we love of our partners and to continue to create more memories with them. Think back to what it was like when you first met and rekindle that flame. Remember the moments when your partner said “I love my fiance” or “I care for you.” It will do wonders for your relationship and will remind you why you fell madly in love with your spouse in the first place when you feel rejected.

“Why Am I Preoccupied With Them?”

Be honest with your feelings when asking, “Why?” Why did you fall in love with the other person? Why do I keep thinking about someone else? What was the void in your marriage that the other person filled for you? Be completely honest with yourself of your spouse’s role in this. The answers you find do not mean you’re dealing with a failed relationship, or that you’re a bad person; it means that your marriage is worth it to you to examine some very painful truths. Achieving soul-satisfying love is, unfortunately, not purely about idealized images of your partner — it’s about being realistic and honest about what you can or cannot provide each other.

Examine Your Constant Responsibility in The Relationship

Here’s the flipside to asking yourself, “Why?” This is another difficult and emotionally taxing examination of why you fell in love with another person and why your marriage is in the position it is today. Be careful to focus on yourself and not your spouse, you already did that. Now’s the time to do some soul searching to find out your part in it.

Counseling

Uncertainty in marriage can leave us feeling incredibly alone however you and your spouse don’t have to face your issues alone. Seeking couples therapy and individual help is a great way to figure out what exactly is causing the issues. While a marriage therapist can’t do all of the work for you, they can act assomeone who can provide you and your partner with support and good advice as you work through your issues.

ReGain: Marital Concerns

In a world that is anything but perfect, it’s comforting to know that online counseling is available if you need help or have questions. At ReGain, it’s simple to make an appointment with professional counselors who will work with you and your spouse to act as relationship helpers and to help get your relationship back on track. They are highly trained and can constantly answer any questions you have about the whys of falling in love with someone else, relationship tips to get you back on track, or relationships in general. They are constantly available seven days a week, 24/7, and are ready to assist you when you’re ready. With such flexible hours and services, you may be able to finally book the marriage counseling you need.

Commonly Asked Questions Below:

Why am I thinking about another man while married?
What do you do when you are married and have feelings for someone else?
Is it normal to have feelings for another man when you’re married?
Is it wrong to think about someone else while in a relationship?
Why do I keep fantasizing about someone else?
What does it mean when you are constantly thinking about someone?

When you think about someone all the time, this is either you hate them or you like them. If you dislike the person, you feel bothered. This keeps you constantly thinking of the person and the negative interactions you had with them. On the other hand, if you have a big crush on someone, you become interested in them. Naturally, this makes your thoughts inclined and focused on that person. However, if you’re in love with a married woman, ideally the best thing to do is to stop what you feel at the earliest. Manage your emotions and pursue a more attainable relationship.

Is having feelings for someone else cheating?
What does emotional cheating look like?
Can you be happily married and attracted to someone else?

What to do if you are emotionally cheating?

The best thing to do if you’re emotionally cheating is to end the emotional affair. Emotional cheating can ruin a relationship since you are betraying your partner by being highly emotionally involved with another person. If you want to save the relationship with your spouse, emotional cheating has to end. Get to the bottom of why you had an emotional affair and be patient in rebuilding the trust of your partner. It is also essential that you and your partner communicate your feelings with each other. If rebuilding the relationship seems like a struggle, working with a professional can be the best option. These professionals help couples move past cheating. You have to be very patient with the process, your partner, and yourself. Remember the moments when you feel “love at first sight” for your partner or when you feel deeply in love with her. Reignite it. You have to work hard in rebuilding the relationship and make it even better than before.